Yes, Pecan.

As always, don’t mind me, I’m just fashionably late to the party.

This should not be a news story. That the same can be said for 85% of all news stories is beside the point.

Let’s sum up. The “left” is mad at a “leftist” publication for making fun of the way the “right” typically makes fun of the “left,” Obama in particular, in such a way that the intent might not be clear1. Or to put it another way, rich white people are afraid poor white people will not get the joke2, other rich white people are worried that if the connection between Obama and all these negative stereotypes keeps getting made, regardless of how rich or smart the white person is, it will begin to take hold in their oh-so-pliable brainmeat, while yet a third group finds it patronizing to imply “middle America” will see this cover and think that either Senator Obama is in fact a secret Muslim terrorist, or that the New Yorker is stating this as their opinion.

I’m torn on this “issue.” On the one hand, John Stewart (our most important Jew) put it best when he said the only sane response from Obama would have been “Barack Obama should in no way be upset about the cartoon that depicts him as a Muslim extremist, because you know who gets upset about cartoons? Muslim extremists. On the other hand, the cartoon is, at least in theory, “difficult” because the actual target of the satire is nowhere to be seen. Is it stupid to vastly overestimate the stupidity of others? Surprisingly enough, this is a question that comes up in my life not infrequently. I leave it up to you to decide3.

  1. Simple, right? []
  2. Can a joke be told too well? []
  3. On second thought, maybe I better not. What’s this? A juice box! Where did this come from? Do you want it? Of course you do, who wouldn’t want a juice box? Here you go. You know what, I can’t remember what we were talking about either. []

Man Sues God

Man Sues God

This is from The Onion right? Will they issue a bench warrant for YHWH?

Who knew libertarianism was so delicious?

Don’t fight it. Just let the desperation wash over you. Accept you can do nothing to change the ridiculous world you were born into. Let your ego die a quiet, dignified death and as your will seeps out of your body and you can no longer tell where You stop and the Universe begins… hit play and PUMP UP THE VOLUME…and be reborn.

I hereby nominate this for Official Summer Jam of ’08. Leona Lewis, you got served.

Genocide for the whole family

Genocide for the whole family

Genocide for the whole family

This isn’t a particularly well made game; Desktop Tower Defense, it’s not. But I defy you to not get a little caught up in the race to exterminate mankind. Finally, a game that explores what it must feel like to be Skynet.

The Most Victimless Crime?

The Most Victimless Crime?

Is harm a necessary component of crime? If I steal your wallet1 but return it with twice the money I found2 would you make a ruckus? If I break into your house3 in order to fix your leaky faucet4 am I going to the hooskow? I just had a chilling5 thought. Anyone know what extradition laws are like in the North Pole6?

1 Illegal.

2 Charity’s still legal right?

3 A crime.

4 Not a crime?

5 Foreshadowing.

6 Sleepy six-year-olds don’t make for reliable witnesses7.

7 Six Seven footnotes for 62 words. I think I broke my own record.

(via BoingBoing)

Watch Closely

Further proof that all magicians are just time travelling demons.

Catfight

How to win (or stop1) any argument.

  1. Just another word for win. []

My teenage self just came in his pants a little.

My teenage self just came in his pants a little.

Embed wasn’t working for some reason so you get to click one extra time. Click. Click click. Click it. Weezhead summer tour ’08. I’ll see you all there. Click click.

What would Klondike do?

Do you have a friend like this? Are you sure? Think carefully. No? Well, then it’s probably you. At least now you won’t be confused when people tell you to stop being such a klondike.

Ay, caramba

They already made this movie. Cheech Marin was already the chihuahua. Race relations were already set back several decades. It was even made by the same people1.

At least when they remade Hulk after only five years a different studio was responsible. What’s your excuse Disney? Have you no shame?

Oh, right.

How you can pass on Lady in the Water but still think this is a good idea is beyond me. Prove me wrong America (with your worthless dollars), but I really don’t see how Oliver & Company benefits from being live action.

Just to be clear: I’m not offended by this as a “latino” or even as someone who doesn’t hate chihuahuas, no I’m offended by this as a human being. With eyes.

Despite their many great accomplishments, including apparently building the Incan city of Machu Picchu, the Aztecs2 got at least one thing wrong. The apocalypse will not wait until December 21, 2012, but instead will drop on October 3, 20083. At least now we have an idea of what form the new cycle of creation will take.

Chihuahuas will inherit the earth.

  1. Well, not literally. They’re in a better place now. Dreamworks? []
  2. By which of course I mean the Mayans. Terence McKenna was Mayan right? []
  3. Good news France, it won’t reach you until April ’09. []

Pay no attention to the man behind the Oval Office drapes

Can someone please explain this to me?

If you commit a crime and your excuse is that an authority figure coerced you, then rather than reducing your culpability, it actually just makes that authority figure even more guilty than if they had just committed the crimes themselves, even if he’s the president.

This is so plainly obvious that I’m amazed it needs stating, but two-thirds of the senate fail to understand this, so apparently it does.

I never realized the presidential pardon can extend to the president issuing it. The constitution grants the head of the executive branch certain powers but I didn’t know they included wizard powers.

I guess it’s not all bad.

Clever girl

Maybe I’m cynical or just can’t remember what it’s like to be so helpless (physically at least) but I’m a little surprised no one jumped up and tried to ride that sucker.

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