When words fail.

For the next 6? 12? hours I will be covering1 the presidential election as quietly as possible. I’m obviously a wordy motherfucker, but today words aren’t enough. With the exception of titles, which I can’t get around, you’ll hear nary a peep from me.

Begin comms silence.

  1. As well as a streaker covers his shame. []

Was it something I said? Or didn’t say?

Was it something I said? Or didn't say?

(via rstevens)

Help is on the way.

Help is on the way

It has recently come to my attention that, despite the seeming contradiction, the visitors to this site are mostly luddites and more surprisingly, luddites with something to say1. Their voice will not be denied.

So in order to accommodate the less technologically inclined2 this modest website is now, after much tinkering and blind fumbling and groping, a bit more user friendly. Comments should be easier to leave and the content is hopefully easier to read.

What’s that? “Thank you”? Don’t mention it, just doing my job3.

Also, don’t forget, your praise is always welcome, but your scorn is downright encouraged.

  1. If you can read this, you’re not Amish. []
  2. Who knew the information super highway is now mainly traveled by horse and buggy. I swear I feel like I’m repeating a joke from 2+ years ago, but again, this is free so that sound you hear is me not caring. []
  3. My thankless, unpaid job. []

Dear Suckers,

ATTN: To the three (and a half1) people who visit this site on at least a semi-regular basis: you no longer have to wait to tell me how brilliant/ignorant/beauteous I am to my face; comments are now enabled.

This ain’t easy folks2 but I do it for you3 and don’t forget, these pearls of wisdom come free of charge4; so settle in, tell your friend(s), and leave me a racist, threatening note.

If not now, when?

  1. You know who you are. []
  2. Sadly, this is not easy. []
  3. Well, not you exactly, but let’s not get bogged down in semantics here. []
  4. A policy which I may have to rethink given the rising cost of hot pockets. []
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